Lately I’ve been seeing a lot of lists. 5 ways to get a guy, 10 ways to lose weight, 15 things to see before you die; and I’ve seen about 3 different lists containing 20 pieces of advice for those in their 20s. Well, since I’m part of the target population of this last one in particular, with which I recently feel bombarded, I figured I’d share the consumer perspective. Here are 20, top 20 lists I’d actually like to see as a 20-something year old:
1. Top 20 ways to stage a run-in with your ex during which you look incredibly hot and they look like a bullet well dodged.
2. Top 20 ways to rid the body of the need for sleep.
3. Top 20 ways to tell your traditional mother that you are not ready for marriage especially because you are still working on moving on from the relationship she barely had a clue about because you aren’t allowed to date until you’re married.
4. Top 20 ways to end world hunger, poverty, social inequalities.
5. Top 20 ways to become famous with integrity (aka – not Rebecca Black style).
6. Top 20 most hilarious ever song parodies.
7. Top 20 ways to convince celebs that they are role models and drugs are just plain bad.
8. Top 20 ways to fake being a good cook.
9. Top 20 ways to never break out ever again. Ever.
10. Top 20 ways to shake people out of their ignorance.
11. Top 20 ways to keep up with the news without going insane or becoming overwhelmed to the point of giving up.
12. Top 20 ways to embarrass your future children with the skill of a sitcom father.
13. Top 20 ways to bring power-hungry folk down a notch.
14. Top 20 ways to non-awkwardly put someone in the friend-zone because the chemistry just isn’t there but they are still pretty great.
15. Top 20 ways to quit a bad habit.
16. Top 20 ways to ensure boy bands never fade away again.
17. Top 20 ways to figure out what the hell you truly want to do with your life.
18. Top 20 ways to become a famous travel writer.
19. Top 20 ways to make time to read for fun, as a working professional.
20. Top 20 things people should stop writing top 20 lists about.