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I wish that we had Lazy Highways.

No, I don’t mean I want cars moving at the speed of mol’asses’ through a mysteriously isolated traffic jam (what’s with those, Houston?)

These Lazy Highways I envision would be just like Lazy Rivers – minus the floaties and pristine waters.

Most days, I dread the 4:35 bell that tells me work is over and the distractions dead for the day. I dread the lonely drive home, forced to be alone with my thoughts at last. I get in my car anyway, roll down my windows turn up the tunes and begin my mental pep talks as I pull out onto the street.

Pretty soon I realize it’s not necessarily the drive I dread, but its conclusion. As the wind caresses my face (yes, it caresses here as opposed to the whipping and slapping in Chicago – thank you Houston!), and Kelly Clarkson reminds me I am stronger, and the rumbling of my Toyota across the road massages my soul, I begin to slow my roll to avoid reaching my final destination.

So many times I have neared my apartment and wanted nothing but to continue driving right past it. But I never do. Where would I go? I love the idea of driving for hours on end with the wind in my hair, sun on my face and music in my mind. Alas, my practical side (we are not good friends) always kicks in. It warns me that actualizing my romanticized dream of continued driving might only result in more pain. You’ll probably hit nasty traffic up ahead, it says. Or, what are you going to do when it gets dark and gloomy out?. Or, where exactly are you going to go anyway?

And so I reluctantly turn onto the street that leads to my cell for another night of continuing work and drowning out my own thoughts with those of my favorite TV characters.

A Lazy Highway would solve many of these problems for me. For the sake of my minor (keep that in mind – minor; business gurus need not judge) in Business Management, I present you all with a SWOT Analysis:

Strengths 

1. Offers safe and legal method for maintaining sanity in today’s world

2. Creates new activity of leisurely driving

3. No floaties

Weaknesses

1. May attract adolescents who blast JBiebs and want to try out their wHeElZ~*

2. Not ideal for going places (perhaps figuratively as much as literally)

3. No floaties

Opportunities

1. Market to directionally challenged lovers of driving

2. Market as self-therapy

3. Market to the elderly

Threats

1. Competition includes more traditional therapies

2. Too much emotional baggage may clog LR

3. Gas prices are unreal

 

Any investors?

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