I’m moving to Houston?!?!
I can tell you it has not sunk in AT ALL. That I am moving to TEXAS. To TEACH. I really can’t decide how I feel about it all. Sometimes I am excited. Most times I am incredibly nervous and trying to figure out exactly why I’m about to do what I’m, well, about to do.
As I finish up my undergraduate career and take my finals I realize in just several months I will be the one administering the tests, grading them. It’s kind of crazy. I’ve always enjoyed working with our youth and I’ve always enjoyed tutoring/teaching. Of all the things I wanted to be growing up (astronaut, lawyer, actress, FBI agent…haha) the ‘teacher-phase’ was definitely the longest.
But now, I find myself constantly wondering why on earth I’ve signed up to do this. And I feel terrible every time I wonder this. Like I’m the only Teach For America corps member who is not overflowing with passion and excitement 24/7. I’m sure I am (what is wrong with me?) And this just makes me feel like I don’t belong before I’ve even really met any of the others!
So why am I doing this? There has got to be more to this than just buying myself some time to figure out the rest of my life. Well, TFA is one of the biggest nonprofits around. And I have always wondered what actually teaching would be like. It used to always kind of be a natural thing for me to do. Like, of course she will be a teacher when she grows up. But the more I was in school the more I resented the idea of being in one for the rest of my life. Still I have always wondered, and this will be a great taste of it.
But this all is a perfect example of how I overthink things. What it comes down to is that I have been given this amazing opportunity to make a difference. I do firmly believe that one of the most influential ways to impact our communities is by positively impacting our children.
The more Teach For Us blogs I read, the more I realize that I will soon have my own set of students. Students to educate, learn from, mentor, discipline, be frustrated with, laugh with and love. And when I think about all of the young personalities I will meet and hopefully have a positive impact on, I smile every time :).
I suppose my hesitations are natural. Becoming a teacher is not the only change taking place here, after all. I am graduating college!! Leaving behind the amazing support system I have here, the familiar, the comforting routine. I am moving to a whole new state!! Leaving behind, it seems, everything I have ever known. This both excites and overwhelms me.
There is so much to be done before I can even go down to Houston for training in less than a month!! I guess I have to try to take everything one step at a time, no big deal…
In the meantime, I will be prepping for finals, packing, having too much fun with friends and getting ready for graduation!